What's wrong with being single?
Over the past year or two, I've come to realize something: I don't want a relationship. Sure, it's fun to think about and pretend to be bitter about, but really, I've come to realize that, sometimes, being single is, well, ok.
If you can't tell, it's Single's Awareness Day/Valentine's Day, and naturally, Facebook is flooded with status updates of "I'm having a great Valentine's Day!", or "Spending the day with my wifey/husband/girlfriend/boyfriend/Ben and Jerry's", or even, "Sitting down to watch for our annual violent movie/Valentine's day celebration". It's a busy day, in other words. You should have seen the amount of women at Target's card section yesterday. Today, I'm sure all the men are there.
But as I myself perused the card section for a nice card for my parents (sorry sisters, I'm cheap), I realized that this year, I didn't really care about not being in a relationship.
You see, I could probably be in a relationship, if I wanted to be. But it wouldn't be the kind of relationship I want. There wouldn't be that, for lack of better term, magic, that is so often associated with being with someone.
Unrealistic? Probably. But I'm young. I've got time to be picky. So why not be so? I'm ready to party hard now (by party, I mean stay up until 5am reading "Percy Jackson and the Sea of Monsters - awesome book!) without having to worry about getting up and looking nice for someone tomorrow. I can be a slob and sit in my comfy pants all day without having to explain myself to a significant other.
I read a great blog post by someone who also has a view of singleness as being awesome, and waiting for something epic instead of something easy. Read it here.
It seems like there's a stigma on single people. There's something wrong with us, our great-grandmas or uncles or aunts are quick to tell us. "Go to college, find a nice boy/girl!" Or "Don't worry, someday you'll find someone!" It's as if everyone in the world is expected to match up and be on their happy way by the age of 30 or 40. And it's not the age I'm looking at here as the problem, it's the "expected to match up".
What if we DON'T want to find someone? What if we go to college and come out with a diploma by spring, and no circular accessory for our fingers? Being single is fun, and liberating, and lets us explore the world and the options before us. We're those people who sit on the fence post and are surprised when we have the chance to get into something, but don't.
Why are we surprised though? I think we're just realizing that we don't want to be in a relationship, so we run when something comes close to being it. We're either not ready, or sometimes, we're holding out.
That's right, holding out.
Everyone wants something epic, but few people hold out for it. Well guess what, we're the ones who want the pie AND the cake AND the ability to eat both, at once. "Epic!" is our battle cry, and we hold out, waiting for it to come over the hill on it's white stallion/dragon/souped up sport car. While we wait, however, we're the liminal people. We're the ones on the borderline; we don't follow society's expectations. We're confusing, and often odd, perhaps eccentric, but we don't mind. After all, we've made it this far along without losing our minds. Or we have, and we don't know it.
There's nothing wrong with being single, and loving it, despite what the media or other people say. We have our doubts and our low points, of course, just like all you committed people have those times where you wonder if you're with the right person. But we get through them, get over them, and go on owning the highest score on Grand Theft Auto that we happened to set ourselves three nights ago. In fact, we could call today Single's Celebration Day, and be perfectly satisfied!
So go forth, my single brethren, and live life!
And don't forget what day it is - eat another brownie, or cookie, or fattening item. After all, we can wear comfy pants the next day and not feel ashamed.
Thoughts about everything when my brain is actually awake.
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4:22 PM
Labels: comfy pants, love, relationships, single
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